Time is your most important asset. Yet for some of us, it can be one of our greatest enemies.
You can’t save it. You can’t store it, or stuff it in a closet to use later.
You can’t make more of it. A minute spent, is spent. You can’t get it back.
You can’t make it go faster.
You can’t make it move slower, although when you are stuck at work doing something you hate, it can seem like forever.
You can’t shrink it, so there is less of it.
Energy is not created or destroyed, it only changes form. But what about time? If we can’t create it, or destroy it, does it change form, too? It doesn’t change forms like matter, but we can change our perception of and our relationship with time.
There are an entire genre of books dedicated to time management. I have read some of them, and gotten some helpful ideas. But many of the strategies they suggested just didn’t work for me. Instead of helping me achieve better time management, I felt like more of a failure. If others found these tips so helpful, why couldn’t I just implement the suggestions they offered?
Well, as I’ve recently discovered, my brain works differently. And maybe yours does, too. I was diagnosed in 2023 with ADHD, which was a huge shock. At first, I felt validated. It explained a lot. Then I was angry. How in the hell could I have lived my entire life without knowing this? Fighting the system. Constantly trying to climb out of the box society tried to put me in. Always feeling like I was doing it wrong.
Whether you have ADHD or not, or simply struggle with time management, stick with me, as we are going down a new path.
What if you could look at time differently, from fresh angles, and feel into it rather than trying to “manage it?” What if you could find some tools that actually work, and start to schedule your life in a way that works for you?
Obviously, all of our situations are different: jobs, kids, spouses, commutes, financial flexibility, but time is one thing we all have in common. We all have 24 hours in a day, and if you wish you had more, keep reading.
When we are super busy, we look at time as this fleeting, slippery void that disappears faster than it appears. I had a client describe time like taffy – it stretched and moved. It was sticky, messy and impossible to contain, form, or work with.
How would you describe time for yourself?
How do you want it to be?
What would be different if it could be like that?
I like to think of time like water, or flow. It flows constantly, like a river. Sometimes slow, like a meandering creek, and sometimes fast, like a raging river, bending around corners with big rapids. Other times it is smooth as glass.
When we are in flow, we feel energized and in sync, like things are working in our favor. We are having fun, engaged, and we are productive as time goes by and we are absolutely immersed in that Flow State. That is when we are hyper focused. Creativity is high and frustration is low. We are working on something really interesting. We lose our sense of time as we are so focused on what we are doing. We are getting shit done, and changing the world.
When do you get into that state?
What are you doing?
Where are you?
Who are you with (or are you alone)?
What time of day is it?
What pulled you out of it?
When we aren’t in a flow state, things can seem hard, like when when, it is something we don’t really want to do, but need to do. For example, maybe it takes the heat of a thousand suns to get you to do something, like work on your taxes. Just the thought of it makes you want to go take a nap, or open a bottle of wine, zone out on social media, or go ride your bike. Heck, even cleaning the toilet seems more important and entertaining than this task. But when it is something important, and we keep putting it off, it just creates more stress, less sleep, and potentially can cost us more money, more time, and delay other decisions that need to be made.
Fortunately, we have options!
● One is to get present with what about this topic causes you to shut down? Notice what happens to your body. Where do you feel tight, or resistant? Where does your mind go? There could be work to do here, and that could take a while. Important work, nonetheless, but that still doesn’t help you right now. Do remember that this is something you want to come back to, and maybe get support with, or read a book on, or listen to a podcast, or journal on, or all of the above.
● Two, set a timer for however long you think you can stand it, say 30 minutes. For 30 minutes, you give it your all on this task. At the end, you have permission to go on and do something else with no guilt, no matter how far you did or didn’t get. You also have the option to set the timer for another round if you got in a grove.
● Three, how can you make this more fun? Can you have a friend come over or meet on zoom, and you both work on your tax stuff at the same time, just not together? Can you put on some upbeat music? What about treating yourself with something once you finish, a reward of some sort? The longer you procrastinate, the longer you have to wait for it.
These are just a few ideas to help you get going on something you don’t really want to work on.
What about the feeling that there isn’t enough time? Brian Tracy, author and speaker on personal development says “There is never enough time to do everything, but there is always enough time to do the most important thing.” This quote brings a few words to mind. Prioritization. Boundaries. Values. Self-care. Knowing what’s important and what really matters helps guide us like a compass, making decisions easier. When we run them through the filter of our values, check them against our goals, and align them with our priorities, it helps us know when to say yes to and when to say no.
While it takes time to plan, to prioritize, and to set goals, the payoff is huge. If you just don’t know where the time goes, try taking a time inventory for a couple days, tracking what you are doing all day. If you live by the billable hour like attorneys and accountants, you do this already. If this is new to you, be glad you don’t have to do this daily! And of course, “there’s an app for that.” It is amazing how much time can go down the black hole of social media, candy crush, or other apps, so I hesitate to recommend another, but you do you. As long as you get an idea of where your time goes if you aren’t totally clear on it.
What’s that thing that’s been in the back (or the front) of your mind for a long time you can’t delegate, you can’t let go of, and you just can’t seem to make time for, but it feels really important?
● Why is it so important?
● What happens if you think about letting it go?
● What opens up for you if you finish it?
● What is one step you could take in the next 5 days, no matter how small, that could get you just that tiny bit closer, and help you feel a smidge better that you finally took some action?
● What accountability do you need?
● When can you work on this again?
Taking our time back puts us back in control. It will never be perfect. Know we can always get better at it. Give yourself space and grace. Experiment. Do something different. You will find a tool, tip, hack or habit that will raise your productivity, and lower your stress level. You got this.
For more articles on productivity, time and energy management, focus, mindset, entrepreneurship with ADHD, and running your business with authenticity, grab my FREE Time and Organization Management Strategies Your Brain and Business Will Love HERE. https://confluencecoaching.life/contact/